I was thinking, what is a good way to celebrate V-day? Then the thought came, why not write about your past love stories throughout your elementary school career? so, here it goes.
Lets start with….crap what is his name……..WHAT IS HIS FREAKING NAME?! I want to say like Sheldon or something, man that’s going to drive me crazy. Anyways, this time in my life was in Kindergarten, he lived down the street and he was the bad boy of the school. Yes, it’s true. I remember one time during a blackout (back when we had blackouts, stupid technology being so advanced) my teach left the room to go check on something, don’t remember what, but as soon as she left he stood up and shouted “SHOOT!” as loud as he could, and being the sheltered child I am, I thought it was a swear. I came home disappointed in the man I was drawn to. But my Mother informed me that is actually not a swear. So the next day he came over for a playdate and called 911 four times because he thought it was “funny”. The cops called back and Mom answered it, wasn’t too happy about it and told us to go outside and wait for his Mom to pick him up. Naturally, we started to throw rocks in the street. Then an old lady pulled over and yelled at us for it. Eventually his Mom picked him up and that was the start of my relationship with the bad boy. It ended later because I had to choose between him or Caden. LOGAN!!! his name was logan…man I was way off.
First grade was a kid by the name of Dillon. Now, you see, Dillon was a twin, we would play underneath the table when the teach wasn’t looking. Everyone liked his brother better but I liked him much better. He would pretend to be my cheetah and would I feed him gummy bears from his lunch bag, because, everyone knows that’s what cheetahs eat. Our relationship came to an end when I dumped him for Ethan.
Ethan. The shy, crybaby in the class. He would only talk to me, not even the teacher. Only me. I spent most my time with him because I felt obligated to do so. After a while I kicked him to the crib and told him to find a new interpreter.
Abe. Good ol’ Abe, the one who got away. Blonde. Killer smile. Everyone thought he had the funniest name because we associated it with Abraham Lincoln, and he was the coolest dude because he knew all about basketball. He left me for Madison.
Now lets see, who was after Abe? I think it was Andrew or Josh. They were right after each other and they were both best friends. I was going through a weird phase with both. Andrew was a sharp dressed kid, I mean the guy wore ascots to school!!! ASCOTS! He was in the 2nd grade and he wore ascots!! And Josh had longer hair than I, greaser too. But each lasted for like a week at the most. But we agreed to be friends so there would be no hurt feelings.
I stayed singled all through 3rd grade because the first day we had a new kid named Sam and I went over to be his friend but he offended me so I stayed clear of guys for that whole year.(If only I was still that smart and will powered).
4th grade. If I’m not mistaken, this is when the new twins moved in, Stockton was nice. We had “Bring your MP3 player to school day” I went over to get a soda and he stopped me and asked what I was listening to, I responded with “styx.” and that was the start of that. During that relationship one of my good friends had a boyfriend named Jason and we secretly liked each other. SECRETLY.
5th grade! Liked this kid named Austin! We had to team up to do this “science” experiment to see why and how balloons stick to your head if you rub them long enough. The balloon stuck to his head better than mine and he said something like, “Maybe it has to do with shampoo, when was the last time you washed your hair?” I thought about it and said 3 days ago. Then he gave me this disgusting look, I realized I lost my chance with him, then realized I actually washed it that morning AND now I realize shampoo plays not factor in it anyways. sooooo his lost.
6th grade I moved out here and jumped from school to school until I found the one I felt most comfortable in. Not leaving me enough time to look for a relationship, maybe thats just and excuse why I didn’t have one…..
Then there’s Caden, probably the best love story I’ve ever had, we were friends since we were babies, because his Mom and my Mom are best friends. Like I said before, I chose him over Logan. Logan, Caden, and I were playing, Logan and Caden didn’t like each other and I asked them why and Logan said because Caden liked me. Caden confirmed this information so I dumped Logan. But I didn’t get together with Caden because he was with Kelsey. one day at his sisters birthday he sat next to me and said, “I hope we can be boyfriend and girlfriend when we are in high school.” WELL CADEN, WE’RE IN HIGH SCHOOL. ……I actually spent New Years with hi3m and….I must say……..he’s looking good.