The Future.

For those who are seniors, or have been, will understand my frustration. Whenever you tell someone that you are a senior in High School, they all ask the same exact freaking question, “WHAT ARE YOU DOING AFTER YOU GRADUATE?!” . . . okay. Maybe not to that extreme but still, the point stands.

Anywho. I hate this question. Why? Let me explain. I am planning on going to college to become an Elementary School teacher, and 99.9% of the time I tell someone that, they respond with, “. . . you know how much they make, right?” and that .1% just simply says, “Oh.” AH!!!  It’s as though they thought I just pulled a random career from the top of my head and stated it, which kind of really offends me! This is my future, I have actually thought about! Of course I know I’m not going to make money!!

It’s as if they think I haven’t thought about any of this. Guys. I know what I want to do. I know I’m going to excell in this particular field and yes. I do in fact know that I’m not going to be living in a mansion with a butler named Mr. Thomas, though that would be cool.

I guess the point of this is the express my feelings and let you know that:

do what you want to do! Don’t let anyone try to change your mind!! If you feel that that is the right place for you, go for it. I know you can make it. And so do you.

Senior Year quote #4

#senioryear

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Valentines Day.

I was thinking, what is a good way to celebrate V-day? Then the thought came, why not write about your past love stories throughout your elementary school career? so, here it goes.

Lets start with….crap what is his name……..WHAT IS HIS FREAKING NAME?! I want to say like Sheldon or something, man that’s going to drive me crazy. Anyways, this time in my life was in Kindergarten, he lived down the street and he was the bad boy of the school. Yes, it’s true. I remember one time during a blackout (back when we had blackouts, stupid technology being so advanced) my teach left the room to go check on something, don’t remember what, but as soon as she left he stood up and shouted “SHOOT!” as loud as he could, and being the sheltered child I am, I thought it was a swear. I came home disappointed in the man I was drawn to. But my Mother informed me that is actually not a swear. So the next day he came over for a playdate and called 911 four times because he thought it was “funny”. The cops called back and Mom answered it, wasn’t too happy about it and told us to go outside and wait for his Mom to pick him up. Naturally, we started to throw rocks in the street. Then an old lady pulled over and yelled at us for it. Eventually his Mom picked him up and that was the start of my relationship with the bad boy. It ended later because I had to choose between him or Caden. LOGAN!!! his name was logan…man I was way off.

First grade was a kid by the name of Dillon. Now, you see, Dillon was a twin, we would play underneath the table when the teach wasn’t looking. Everyone liked his brother better but I liked him much better. He would pretend to be my cheetah and would  I feed him gummy bears from his lunch bag, because, everyone knows that’s what cheetahs eat. Our relationship came to an end when I dumped him for Ethan.

Ethan. The shy, crybaby in the class. He would only talk to me, not even the teacher. Only me. I spent most my time with him because I felt obligated to do so. After a while I kicked him to the crib and told him to find a new interpreter.

Abe. Good ol’ Abe, the one who got away. Blonde. Killer smile. Everyone thought he had the funniest name because we associated it with Abraham Lincoln, and he was the coolest dude because he knew all about basketball. He left me for Madison.

Now lets see, who was after Abe? I think it was Andrew or Josh. They were right after each other and they were both best friends. I was going through a weird phase with both. Andrew was a sharp dressed kid, I mean the guy wore ascots to school!!! ASCOTS! He was in the 2nd grade and he wore ascots!! And Josh had longer hair than I, greaser too. But each  lasted for like a week at the most. But we agreed to be friends so there would be no hurt feelings.

I stayed singled all through 3rd grade because the first day we had a new kid named Sam and I went over to be his friend but he offended me so I stayed clear of guys for that whole year.(If only I was still that smart and will powered).

4th grade. If I’m not mistaken, this is when the new twins moved in, Stockton was nice. We had “Bring your MP3 player to school day” I went over to get a soda and he stopped me and asked what I was listening to, I responded with “styx.” and that was the start of that. During that relationship one of my good friends had a boyfriend named Jason and we secretly liked each other. SECRETLY.

5th grade! Liked this kid named Austin! We had to team up to do this “science” experiment to see why and how balloons stick to your head if you rub them long enough. The balloon stuck to his head better than mine and he said something like, “Maybe it has to do with shampoo, when was the last time you washed your hair?” I thought about it and said 3 days ago. Then he gave me this disgusting look, I realized I lost my chance with him, then realized I actually washed it that morning AND now I realize shampoo plays not factor in it anyways. sooooo his lost.

6th grade I moved out here and jumped from school to school until I found the one I felt most comfortable in. Not leaving me enough time to look for a relationship, maybe thats just and excuse why I didn’t have one…..

Then there’s Caden, probably the best love story I’ve ever had, we were friends since we were babies, because his Mom and my Mom are best friends. Like I said before, I chose him over Logan. Logan, Caden, and I were playing, Logan and Caden didn’t like each other and I asked them why and Logan said because Caden liked me. Caden confirmed this information so I dumped Logan. But I didn’t get together with Caden because he was with Kelsey. one day at his sisters birthday he sat next to me and said, “I hope we can be boyfriend and girlfriend when we are in high school.” WELL CADEN, WE’RE IN HIGH SCHOOL. ……I actually spent New Years with hi3m and….I must say……..he’s looking good.

New Year.

2015 has finally come!! I remember when I was a little kid and my family had Back to the Future marathons and Marty goes to the year 2015 in the 2nd one. Every time I watched it, I had this feeling of great excitement for that year to come (probably because of the hover boards) I knew it was going to be a good one, it had to be!

It didn’t take me long to realize 2015 would be the year I graduate High School, meaning the year I would turn 18. This just added to my excitement. And last year when two of my brothers announced they’re expecting a baby, I knew this was going to be beyond fantastic year.

Then the Age of Ultron trailer came out. That did it for me, I could no longer wait for 2015.

Graduation, turning 18, a new nephew, a new niece, Avengers 2, Mocking Jay 2, Doctor Who season 9, Sherlock season 4,  like, is there anything that could make this year better?!

However, this year won’t be perfect! I know there will be days when I feel like I can’t continue and everything is too much, but in the end, I know that everything will work out.

In the words of one of an amazing man, ” I want to be able to say through the hard times and through the good times, I had a wondrous time.” -Olan Rogers.

That quote is now officially my theme for this year!

So, I welcome you, 2015! I know you’ll be 100x better than 2014! Heck, anything is better than 2014.

 (actually yes, yes you do.)

Favorite Quotes.

10. “Nerds like us are allowed to be unironically enthusiastic about stuff. Nerds are allowed to love stuff-like, jump-up-and-down-in-your-chair-can’t-control-yourself love it. When people call people nerds, mostly what they’re saying is ‘You like stuff,’ which is not a good insult at all. Like, ‘You’re too enthusiastic about the miracle of human consciousness.'” -John Green

9. “He worked really hard, Grandpa.”

“So do washing machines.” -Christmas Vacation

8. “That’s the real trouble with the world, too many people are grown up.” -Walt Disney

7. “Some people have a way with words, others not have a way.” -Steve Martin

6. “Why do we fall? So that we can learn to pick ourselves up.”-The Dark Knight

5. “I may be on the side of the angels but don’t think for one second that I’m one of them.” -Sherlock

4. “When you’re a kid, they tell you it’s all…grow up. Get a job. Get married. Have a kid, and that’s it. But the truth is, the world is so much stranger than that. It’s so much darker. And so much madder. And so much better.”-Doctor Who

3. “You can’t cling to the past, because no matter how tightly you hold on, it’s already gone.”-How I Met Your Mother

2. “Sometimes courage is that voice at the end of the day that says, ‘I’ll try again tomorrow.'”-Thomas S. Monson

1. “You have brains on your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who will decide where to go.”-Dr. Seuss

I find peace in the rain.

“How is he today?” I asked Jessica taking off my wet coat. “Not good,” She shook  her head while reading a patients file, “I think he’s going today.” My eyes fell to the floor along with my heart. “Is he awake?” She nodded, without furthering the conversation I made my way to his room and heard his favorite record playing. “How are you doing today, Mr. Mosby?” He was slowly tapping his finger to the music and lazily looking out at the window. “Ah,” He let out a breath, “Not feeling like a young man, that’s for sure.” I laughed.

“Well, perhaps tomorrow you will.” He weakly smiled. “Yes, I believe tomorrow I will.” He seemed mesmerized by the falling rain. “I’m sorry today isn’t very pretty! Hopefully soon it will dry up!” I noted breaking the silence but  he shook his head in disagreement. “No, I think it’s beautiful.” I watched him staring at the window, I could tell he was thinking about something by the way the rested his eyebrows. “You know, that’s how I met her, in the rain.” I smiled. “Are you talking about Mrs. Mosby?” He nodded smiling reverently. “Tracy.” It seems like just saying her name refueled his energy. “You probably don’t want to hear an old man’s story though.” “Are you crazy?! I love your stories!” I darted to the chair next to his bed, but he kept his attention to the window.

“I was at a train station waiting for it to come in,” He coughed a little bit, “the rain was just pouring down,” He laughed which turned into a cough, “and there she was, standing underneath her umbrella,” He paused then continued. “waiting for her train too,she was so beautiful, I had to talk to her so I walked over and accused her of stealing my umbrella.” He looked over at me, “of course that was my idea of a pick up line,” We laughed together then he looked back at the window to continue, “then  I asked her on a date and the rest is history.”

A small tear ran down his cheek. “Mr. Mosby, don’t cry!” He rubbed the tear from his face. “I’m not sad, I’m actually,” he closed his eyes trying to come up with the right word, “Excited.”

“Excited?” I asked. “Excited for what?” He slightly opened his eyes. “To see her again,” MR. Mosby took a deep breath and released it, “and I think it will be pretty soon.” I grabbed his hand.  He noticed the tear that was now running down my face, “It’s okay.” He reassured me with a smile. “I find peace in the rain.” He turned his head to the window and let of his last breath.

Bilbo Baggins Tho.

Let’s talk.

Talk about what? I don’t know, maybe something awesome like. . . THE HOBBIT!! Full disclosure, my ManCrushMondays will always and forever go out to Bilbo Baggins. Don’t judge me, I just love the little guy! You know you’re pretty awesome when Leonard Nimoy made a song about you (he really did, look it up).  But in the second Hobbit movie, The Desolation of Smaug, I got mad at him! Yes it’s true. You remember that part when he was talking to Gandalf outside of the forest? And he was like:

“I was going to tell you… I found something in the Goblin tunnels.” And Gandalf goes:

“Found what? What did you find?” Then Bilbo reaches in his pocket and holding the ring about to tell him that he got this magical ring that turns him freaking invisible but then HE DECIDED NOT TO and said:

“My courage.”

That made me mad! Like!! AH!!!!  Mind you, when I watched this movie for the first time I was on a date and it took everything in me not to take off my shoe and throw it at the screen, after all I didn’t want to scare off my date, but now that I think about it I should’ve!!! Opportunity wasted!!!!!!!!!!!! However, no matter how mad I was/still am at Bilbo, I still love him. In the words of John Green:

 I don’t know a perfect person. I only know flawed people who are still worth loving.

#Relationshipadvice

Moral of the story: Don’t stay mad at loved ones.There’s always a good John Green quote for anything. When you’re on a date don’t resist the urge to throw your shoe at something. And Bilbo Baggins is amazing.

Dreams.

“I got dreams like you, no really! Just much less. . .touchy-feely!” This statement pretty much sums up this blog post. I do have dreams, but you know you have those girls who are like, “My dream is to meet the perfect man, with blonde wavy hair, tight build, gorgeous smile, surgeon, love to surf, adventurous, and wants to have his own family one day. Then we will marry and live in Europe for the rest of our life!” Yeah, that is definitely not me.

Sure I want to meet a man and marry him but I’m not planning out what he looks like and or smells like, that’s just creepy. So what’s my dream?

Life, I guess!

I want to major in Elementary Education, yes I want to become an elementary school teacher and yes I am aware they don’t make a lot of money but that’s what I want to do! I also want to travel! Where to? Everywhere from London to New Zealand! Before, after, or during traveling, I want to meet a guy is just as nerdy as me and get married to him. Then have some kids and raise them. And that’s it! It seems kind of boring but that’t what it is.

Live life is my dream.

Challenges.

We’ve all have faced challenges in our lives, from Starlord trying to save the galaxy to the average house cat trying to decide to eat tuna first and then take a nap or to take a nap first then take a nap. Nonetheless, we’ve all gone through them and will continue to face them until the day our hearts stop working and we face death.

So, the question stands, what challenges have I been through? To be honest, a lot. I’ve only been alive for 211 months, (yes I did the math myself, if only my 2nd grade teacher could see me now) 17 years and 7 months, that’s not very long. I’ve gone through pain of losing loved ones, broken heart (still not over Kevin Jonas getting married), finance struggles, finding out who I am, separation, failure, disappointment, etc. I think all of us have experienced similar challenges in one way or another, I’ve decided to write about the challenge that I have been facing most recently.

This trial started five years ago, I was in the 6th grade, and my Dad had his first heart attack, key word: first. Two years later he had his second, last year, 2013, he had his third…….on Halloween, that was a fun holiday. And last Friday, October 10th, he had his first stroke. In between his heart attacks and stroke he has had knee surgery, a broken back, countless illnesses, and 3 broken ribs due to how hard he was coughing when he had bronchitis. The man is unstoppable! The insane part is if you ever see him just walking by you would not believe that he has bad health! It’s crazy! as you can imagine we have a bunch of medical bills, but its worth it to have my Daddy still alive and kicking! It might not seem like that big of a challenge to you, but trust me it is. I’ve learn to deal with this three ways, first: Family. Second: Medical Doctors. Third: Faith.

I have fears.

I have a weird fear. Yes, like most, I am afraid of the average spider and heights, but that’s not my biggest fear, my biggest fear is called Taphephobia, which is the fear of being buried alive. Weird fear to have, right? Why do I have this fear? Well, when I was younger I use to watch a show called Smallville anddddddd there was this episode where Chloe gets kidnapped and buried alive. It scared the heck out of me. I’m still afraid of it!!!

Every time I go to a funereal I watch the dead persons stomach to make sure they’re not breathing. When it’s my funereal I want someone to do the same thing for me because I DONT WANT TO BE BURIED ALIVE. So that’s my fear.

 (I just met this man)

A Poem.

When I think of poetry, I think of Shakespeare. You know, boring and never ending. I never got into his work, I wont lie, if a guy I just met was outside my window at night saying stuff like,

“O, speak again, bright angel, for thou art as glorious to this night, being o’er my head, as is a winged messenger of heaven.”

I would probably freak out, grab pepper spray, and then go get my Dad and he would chase him down…..so no one please do that.

For an assignment we had to find a poem that we really enjoyed. At first I did not like this idea but then I found this poem and…..well just read it and then you’ll understand.

A Life Of A Cupcake By Shelby Greer 

They put me in the oven to bake.
Me a deprived and miserable cake.
Feeling the heat I started to bubble.
Watching the others I knew I was in trouble

They opened the door and I started my life.
Frosting me with a silver knife.
Decorating me with candy jewels.
The rest of my batch looked like fools.

Lifting me up, she took off my wrapper.
Feeling the breeze, I wanted to slap her.
Opening her mouth with shiny teeth inside.
This was the day this cupcake had died.

Why does this poem matter to me? Well. I always thought  what a cupcakes life would be like/feel like and now this big question in my life has been answered. I feel very strongly about this, it bring joy and happiness to my soul.

 This is a picture of a cupcake being murdered. sorry if its too scary……………get over it.